Taxi Drivers and Their Mothers

A rewarding and high-risk question to ask for good food.

It’s been a while since I hopped in a cab in my hometown, what about you? I usually take one when rushing to an event or running late to catch a train. Under those circumstances, I don’t get around to asking my favorite question to cab drivers. It’s a simple question that teaches me about my city and hopefully brings me to a good restaurant.

This question is a secret weapon but if you decide to use it, pray the person in question hasn’t passed away. If so, you are in for a very awkward and unpleasant ride.

The question goes:

“Where would you take your mother for dinner, if it was her birthday?”

A question to ask right from the get-go when you arrive somewhere new, or right where you live. The severity of the question proves you are not here to play games.

Let’s all hope the driver’s mother is still alive and kicking, healthy, and enjoys a good meal. Then, consider yourself lucky because most of the time you will get a damn good restaurant recommendation.

Unless the driver’s mom is pissed their grown child became a taxi driver and wished so much more of them. You end up staring down the road in silence along with your driver because you triggered their trauma which is spiraling in front of you, worth a decent tip for the ride. But, let’s presume all goes well!

The question does not feign contemplation from the driver (as shown with the example of potential trauma). Asking for recommendations or favorites can be swept under the rug, scoffed at, or replied with absolute indifference. Those questions are cumbersome and overbearing of serious thought.

Our question sets a foundation of seriousness and precision, it’s sharp. The gravity of the question forces genuine consideration. In this question, the mother is a person you love and respect (hopefully). So that already raises the respect for the question and the answer. It’s not a question to be taken lightly, it shows when you ask it.

I’m giving you this tip because in less than a month from today, for most of the world, it will be Mother’s Day. This gives you ample taxi time to test out our powerful question.

Or even better, if the cab driver recommends a restaurant where they would bring their mother. Go to that restaurant and enjoy. Afterward, ask the waiter that you will buy the chef a beer, if the chef answers where they would take their mother to dinner for her birthday. But please don’t ask that during a rush. Ask on a slow evening.

Boom! Bravo to myself. That is some next-level stuff right there! I need to test that one. Some gastronomical Inception that would have DiCaprio lose track of what just happened.

Pasta della nonna-ly yours,

The Greasy Pen.